The Lady is a Vamp(ire)..

i'm staying with J. D can wait. i've waited forever for him, and i'm happy now! i don't want to ruin that happiness and make someone else miserable.

i talked with J on the phone for an hour last night...completely effortlessly. it was really nice. and he said he might be able to come visit me for my birthday! :D i'm so happy.

Posted in Chicago. Home. Life.

i miss my boyfriend so much!

he's back in michigan, by detroit so that's a 5 hour drive from chicago! ugh i hate this!

and the worst part is that my best guy friend, D, told me about a month ago that he was in love with me. the thing is, that i was (probably still am...) too. i liked D since 2005, and i've waited for him to say this to me for so long! i know when i see him it's gonna be awkward at first and then absolutely perfect, like we were meant to be. my psychic aunt even said we were soul mates.

ugh. what do i do? my bf, J even said that he "gets over things quickly", but i don't want to be gotten over quickly lol. i dunno. things are all over the effing place now.

one thing i DO know is that J is not giving me what i want. i guess after reading Twilight i've come to see that i want passion, romance, and pure love in a relationship. i don't wnat anything to be held back you know? i knwo i'll probably never find someone like Edward but i would like to hope i'll come very close. but for now...i miss my bf a lot. i just want to cuddle with someone i love...

Posted in Chicago. Home. Life.

WOW. WOW. WOW.....did i say WOW?

simply amazing. the trailer for Twilight came out yesterday and i'm already dying to see more. they meant to tease and they SURE AS HELL did!

okay so here's my break down:

opening shot: AMAZING. Edward looks and sounds dark, mysterious, deep and looks like he's staring at Bella like he wants to kill her (which he does lol).

*the hunt scene: so dark and creepy! especially Edward in the beginning all crouched down, looking up through his lashes...YUM.

*emmitt and edward: ahh emmitt being all "protector-ish". everyone says how emmitt loves Bella, but remember the Cullens had to trust Edward and Bella in the beginning. so it makes sense.

*the almost-kiss scene: AHHHH CRAZY! she can't breathe and he's all like "oh shit i can kill her, but what the hell..."

*car scene: umm isn't Edward supposed to have a Volvo S60? NOT a hatchback?? wtf, he looks like a scocor mom..lol jk he's gorgeous standing next to his car, but still. as long as the car is fast and hot them whatever.

*saving Bella: WOW. took my breath away!! exactly how i pictured it! he just sticks his hand up and saves her! and then she looks at him like "what the hell are you?" and he looks at her with such an intense reaction, like "holy shit did i just do that in front of everyone? and wow she's so beautiful...and tasty...". i think this scene is one of the PIVITAL moments in the book when he sees that yes he cares about Bella more than just someone he's thirsty for. and you can totally see it in his eyes in that scene!

*room scene: obviously in Edward's room with it having a lot of cds, a couch and a plasma tv in the background. i think Edward could've done something more vicious when he said "you shouldn't have said that" but then again he does his crooked smile *swoons* like he's thinking of something to: A) scare her, B) impress her, or C) just to give her a little thrill...because Edward can be all evil like that haha.

okay well that's a bit much just on 59 seconds of film but hey. until the regular trailer comes out and the movie, this is what's gonna have to take up my time.

any Twilighters reading this? feel free to message me or IM me! (s/n: cubbiejules) i would love to chat! :)

Posted in OCD (Obsessive Cullen Disorder)

holy shit. holy shit.

i just moved out of my dorm today. last day of sophomore year at msu. i am officially an "upperclass man". eww. lol.

i guess the best part about this whole year is that i'm finding a bit more about myself, and who i am each year. with each mistake, each triumph, and each choice made is one step closer to determining who i am. and it's great.

for instance: my boyfriend. sure he's great and wants to be with me...but he's not the one for me. he's the one for right now. he's more of the sutudious, working type. he has his priorities and i'm just something great on the side. well i'm not a side dish.

i'm a romantic and i'm not gonna change that for anyone. i shouldn't need to compromise who i am for anyone. what is the most difficult thing is that i KNOW he has the capability to be that romantic guy. he just has a lot more on his mind first. so i guess i'm just going to see what happens this summer!

first blog entry! yay! tune in to see what happens in college, back home in chicago, and even my latest rants/raves about Twilight and of course Edward Cullen and the gang. my new obsession. and i love it :)

Posted in College. Life.